Manic Streak Features

Although I would never knowingly demean a diagnosed, chronic sufferer with what could well be petty hypochondria, I have always felt that I suffered from an (albeit mild) form of manic depression. I know it's more serious than just having a good day/bad day, because there's a knowing sense of self-destruction in both the 'up' and 'down' states. In a period of mania, I deliberately take on too much - I find it impossible to say 'no' to a job responsibility, a night-out or the chance to create a song/script/podcast with my friends. There's a breathless, frenzied feeling, whereby I need to work and to communicate frantically, almost in spite of myself. 

Inevitably these manic sprees of activity have the effect of me spreading myself too thinly. On a  micro scale, it has meant that in just one given week I've been committed to, for instance, several band rehearsals, web promotion, logistical organisation, the gig itself, part-time work, full-time study, drinks with work friends, drinks with band friends. On a macro scale, this past year I've been committed to: moving to London, finding a new job, completing a PhD, getting married and finding ways of paying for all of the above.

As such, my 'down' periods are (fairly obviously) filled with guilt - I'm not good enough to meet all of these challenges, I'm letting people down and the only logical thing to do is to stay in bed and eat lots of cheese. Okay, the cheese part is particular to me, but you get my meaning...

My reason for this quite startling confessional, is that I think the rest of the country is falling into my bad habits. It seems that at the slightest hint of good news, we celebrate wildly and project all of our hopes and ambitions, unrealistically, onto the object of our affections. For example, I've read broadsheet newspapers referring to Barack Obama as 'Superman' without irony. Sporting success is lavished with OBEs and Knighthoods; a few inches of snow is embraced by some as though miniature angels were falling from the sky. (Remember, I'm not criticising here - these are my habits that you lot are emulating - I had a brilliant snow day!)

The national 'downside' to all of this is almost too obvious to list here: the recession is biting, unemployment rising, trust in domestic politics is at an all time low, moral standards are (supposedly) in decline and 'why are we all making such a fuss about a bit of snow' etc etc. For more examples, just tune into Radio 5 live for a couple of minutes at any point of the day (it's the equivalent of a national psychiatrists chair).

Indeed, if we are to look for the cause of this polarising of the national mood, the media is a good place to start. I'm sure 20 years ago, the average person's exposure to the news consisted of a quick scan of the headlines in the morning and half an hour with Trevor McDonald at night. Nowadays it's inescapable - we're handed newspapers for free on our way to work, 24 hour news channels and internet sites are constantly turning the wheels of fear, spin and hyperbole. It can become addictive - I'm sure I wasn't the only person hitting 'refresh' every 5 seconds during yesterday's closure of the football transfer window. 

Yet it's not all the fault of the media. Just as I manically get the urge to start a new project or move house, without thinking about the consequences - the nation as a whole has been brandishing credit cards and plundering overdrafts, literally as though there's no tomorrow. The 'down' period is therefore inevitable, obvious, but painful nonetheless.

My personal demons have been addressed, somewhat, by embarking upon regular work and by embracing that cold, cruel mistress: routine. I now have fewer manic phases (being given a scholarship for 3 years meant that there was no routine - my mood was up and down like a yoyo) and fortunately less 'down' time. 

Perhaps therein lies the cure for everyone else - take a  deep breath and look around you, cherish the everyday and the mundane. Obama will make mistakes, British cyclists will win silver medals, the snow will thaw. But by the same token, the economy will improve and politicians will be held accountable. 'Moderation in all things' has always struck me as a decidedly depressing mantra, yet it could well be the solution to our national manic depression.