However much I might deny it, pointing to the odd Marvin Gaye or Aimee Mann album, the relationship I've been in has been with indie music, and a pretty monogamous relationship at that. I'll be forever grateful to my parents for encouraging me to play their Beatles, Stones and Kinks LPs when I was growing up. This led, fairly predictably, to an initial love for Oasis and subsequently (mercifully) Manic Street Preachers, to whom I will always be wed.
Manics aside, the indie music genre I've spent my life exploring, collecting, obsessing over and trying to get involved with, (via Tokyo Beatbox, a delightfully jangly combo of eloquent gents) has always had its problems. With a few notable exceptions, the way that indie bands address and refer to women is naive at best, downright misogynistic at worse. Just think of the clumsy sentiments of meat-heads like Jet ('are you gonna be my girl') or even New-Wave saviours The Strokes ('you talk way too much'). The relationship the genre has with women is inherently problematic. Granted, recently there have been many more successful female-fronted bands (CSS, The Ting Tings, The Long Blondes), but this is a very recent phenomenon. Think back to Oasis' heyday - Elastica, Sleeper, Garbage, Catatonia and ... and hardly a reflection of the talents of 50% of the population. Especially when you consider that all of those bands had predominantly male songwriters and musicians, and at least 3 of them were just shit.
To put it another way, compare the indie female contingent to that of every other musical genre. Let's assume that pop is the genre that encompasses the most successful elements of every other genre. Pop has developed and promoted female talent for decades - The Beatles toured alongside Lulu, Cilla and Dusty. Soul and R n B has always boasted a talented and successful female stable, which can be traced from Billie Holliday to Diana Ross and through to Beyonce, Rihanna and Estelle. I'd argue that even Country music (not renowned for its open-mindedness) is more willing to celebrate its female talent than those at the top of the indie hegemony.
Because surely that's where the trouble lies - I'm sure very few people in the indie fraternity actively hate women. Rather, it's reluctant to give female artists the same sort of opportunities it offers to men. The genre seems to maintain its queasy, schoolboy view of women (we sort of like them, we want to get off with them, but we don't need to waste time understanding them). And for all the sneering that indie boys might do at 'manufactured pop' moguls such as Simon Cowell, you couldn't question his record for discovering and promoting female talent. Indeed, what would have become of the ridiculously talented Leona Lewis if she'd joined a band and sent a demo tape into Rough Trade? My guess is not very much.
The same argument applies to race. It's an overwhelmingly white genre - black singers like Kele from Bloc Party and Lightspeed Champion seem to be the exception, not the rule. Indeed, it shouldn't be ignored that Kele was recently racially abused by members of (punk/indie deity) John Lydon's entourage. Again, I don't believe that the vast majority of the Indie clique are consciously racist. But they should be embarrassed by the fact that they lack so far behind Simon Cowell et al in this respect.
This has personally come to light for me as I teach at a particularly diverse college - the black/white split is approximately 50/50. As a teacher you constantly strive for reference points - shared cultural experiences that you can use to relate to your students. In this regard, my love affair with Indie has badly let me down.
So can I trust him any more? Should I stay with him? We've been through so much, but I'm just not comfortable now. Can anyone help?